That is the first thing that I think of when I think of my Poppop, with a warm smile as a close second. My Poppop was a man who loved his family, and took me as I was through every outrageous phase of my adolescence. I loved him as deeply as I loved my own parents. He and my Mommom were the heart of my mother's side of the family... every summer it was expected to meet at their home in the beautiful suburbs of Philadelphia for family get togethers, BBQ's, and many, many laughs. He was a man of integrity and pride, but above all else, he was a protector and provider to his family. His hugs were always a welcome sign that I was home.
It's hard to believe that he's been gone for almost a decade... My heart still aches when I think about all the things I wish he had lived to see, because I know he would have been so happy to see me turn into the woman I am today. He would have loved my husband, and even more so, he would have absolutely adored my daughter... not just because they are wonderful people, but because they are part of me.
My mother inherited his bright Blue eyes, and from her, I inherited a duller pair of baby blues. There is a comfort I see when I look into the eyes of my mom, because I see him shining through her. Shortly after he passed, I remember having a dream about him. There he was, sitting by his "Pond" (The pool at my grandparents house)... As with most dreams, things were vague and whimsical... He was so bright and almost blinding... the only thing I could really identify were his beautiful blue eyes; I knew it was him. He told me that he couldn't stay long but that he needed me to tell my mom that everything was alright, and that he was OK now. He asked me to look after her since she was feeling so alone, which I assured him I would. With that he told me he loved me, and would always be with me... as I began to cry and beg for him to stay, I woke up...unable to catch my breath and tears burning my cheeks. I've never been one to believe in people who can communicate with those who have passed, but I know deep in my heart, that he wanted to make sure that his little girl (my mom) was OK, because that's just the kind of man he was.
I took this picture of my daughter this afternoon.... her eyes are hazel, grey, and every once in a very great while, in the right light, they have a sparkle of blue in them. Every time I see that hint of blue shine through, I think of my Poppop and know that he's here with me. He lives through me, my family, and now my daughter.
I miss you dearly, Poppop...
Love always,
Trissy
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your story has me speechless; how beautiful the gift he gave to visit you from beyond for i believe he did and i believe if you watched your daughter as a baby, she saw him there with you for i believe he and your mommom are there with you cheering you on and watching you walk through life; your photos side by side are a beautiful pairing of blue eyes. xxoo
ReplyDeletewhat a beautiful story. what an amazing thing. this post has me shaky and happy and enamored, all at once. your writing was such a gift. sharing him and your little girl was too. lovely, patricia...and what joy in her little eyes.
ReplyDeletewhat a beautiful post this week Tricia! I so identify with the feelings you have for your grandfather and completely understand the heart-longing that continues even 10 or more years after someone you love so much passes away from this life. Thank you for sharing such a beautiful and personal part of you. Additionally, the image of your daughter is so striking and lovely, you did a fantastic job. =)
ReplyDeletethank you so much for sharing your memories of your poppop with us. truly sounds like a wonderful man that you cherished deeply. And your little girls eyes are amazing. How fantastic to look at her and your mom and be reminded of such a special part of your life.
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